Thursday, April 9, 2009

How To Your Ex Girlfriend To Love You Again

Just how long or how quickly has it taken you to figure out that you want to find out how to get your ex girlfriend back? Some guys find out the minute their girlfriends walk out on them that they want them back. Other guys don't really find out until they're dating someone else only to discover that 'something's missing' with the new girl. How to get your ex girlfriend back under whatever time lapse, involves the same steps. It can be quick and it can be easy, if you follow some basic steps.

Keep yourself looking smart and fit. It's really easy when you feel down and stressed to find yourself eating the wrong foods and not taking care of yourself. You'd be surprised how quick it is to pile on the pounds in a matter of weeks of self-indulgence. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and get down to the gym or over to the football field with a few of the guys.

If you want to know how to get your ex girlfriend back then after you've had a kick around with the guys, go shower and change and get out on the town and enjoy yourself. It won't necessarily do your chances of getting back with your ex any harm if you casually date another girl. Remember, you're not actually in a relationship with your ex, you might want to be, but until that dream is an actual, you're a free agent. But don't set out to hurt some other girl just because you want to make your ex jealous or just because you're thinking about yourself. Just make it clear to the girl that you're just interested in some fun and nothing more.

Get everything that happened in your past relationship into perspective. There's no point fooling yourself about what went wrong in the relationship. You need to come at this situation with fresh and clear honesty if any reconciliation is going to be effective and long lasting. So if you have mistakes to own up to, if you're sure you want to understand how to get your ex girlfriend back, make sure that you accept your part in the break down of your relationship.

When you're feeling emotionally secure and you've thought through the relationship and have a healthy perspective, make contact with your ex and talk to her. You don't at this point want to put any pressure on her. You simply want to spend a couple of minutes on the phone with her weighing up where she's at and whether you think she's in an approachable mood. Depending on what you deduce, you either ask for a second chance or you retreat and give it more time.

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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Help Me Save My Marriage

“Help me save my marriage!”. Are you asking the same question right now? Believe it or not, you are not alone. This is the cry from many who see their relationships or marriage falling apart right before their eyes and they do not know what to do to stop it.

If you aren't ready to see your marriage sink into the abyss, you need help save marriage advice. You need an S.O.S. You need to learn to sacrifice for your marriage, you have to learn to open up and communicate, and you have to learn to simplify your lives so things aren't so complicated.

Sacrifice:
Many times those who are wanting help save marriage are really more interested in trying to get the other person to fix their problems. If you are looking at the other person as the root of the problem, take a close look at yourself. It may very well be that the other person is causing all the problems but you need to make sure that you aren't making matters worse.

Most of the time marriages fall apart because one or both of the people start getting selfish and feel that the world revolves around them. The truth is that if that is your perspective, the marriage is doomed. The two of you are supposed to be as one and this can not be if you are only looking out for #1. You have to be able to sacrifice parts of yourself for the existence of the marriage. It takes the two of you realizing that if you want to be as one, you may have to sacrifice yourself. The choice is simple, live as one or live as two people.

Open Up:
There is a tendency that many people have to bottle things up when we are stressed. This isn't healthy for any individual and it especially isn't healthy for a marriage. When contents are under pressure for too long and that pressure grows, things are likely going to build up too much. When thing build up too much they may reach the point that there is an explosion.

There may have been firecrackers going off when the two of you first kissed. It is nothing like the Nuclear Bomb that could go off when you have let things stay bottled up for two long in a marriage. The longer you wait to bring resolution or to communicate problems, the bigger the explosion will be. You need to open up a bit to take off the pressure and help save marriage.

Simplify:
We have a tendency to make things a lot more complicated than what they need to be. We make big issues out of little ones and mountains out of mole hills. Blowing things out of proportion is something that many who need help save marriage will do that makes things worse than they need to be.

Consider what it is that you really need to have in a mate. What is it you really need to exist. Try and simplify it as much as possible. Stop looking at all the details and try to find the root of the problems.

Are you making too many demands? Are you being too picky about how you think things should be? Are you expecting too much?

Take a step back and consider that you may be making things more complicated than they need to be. Simplify and you just may be able to help save marriage.

The best resource that can help you save your marriage is the Magic of Making Up. Learn more about it and find out if you have a chance to get back the life you once live and bring back the happiness in your relationship once again.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Ending a Relationship Gone Sour

According to TDub's Magic of Making Up book, While ending a relationship is hardly at the top of anybody’s calendar, the fact is that when a relationship has gone sour, someone has to make the move to end it. The truth is that many relationships last long beyond the “expire by” date just because breaking up is hard to do.

Sometimes a break up happens in dramatic fashion with clothes being thrown out of a second story window.

Other times, the relationship just peters out until someone says “it’s caput.”

How do you go about ending a relationship so that neither party gets hurt?

You need to get clear on why you want to terminate the romance. The immediate reason that jumps into your mind may not be the real reason. Once you get clear, the next step in ending a relationship is to get honest. That means that in your discussion with your partner that you are true to yourself and to them.

Schedule a mutually convenient time for the breakup. In general, it is better to do it in person rather than over the phone, but if distance is an issue in the relationship, you should do it sooner than wait for a time you can get together.

Get into a state of compassion when ending the relationship. If you want to stay friends after the break up, you need to conclude the romantic ties with love and compassion.

Don’t put your partner on the defensive. Talk about the things you’ve learned and the memories you will cherish that have come from your love. Be present during the break up. Your partner may become very emotional during this time. You need to respond to their needs.

Don’t take anything personally when ending a relationship. Your partner may say things they don’t really mean. Let these words roll off of your back.

Your partner may need to meet with you more than once to conclude the relationship. Or, they may need space. Give your ex what they need to get through the transition time.

But don’t let them make you feel guilty. You’re ready to begin a new phase in your life and it will not include a romantic relationship with your ex. It is best if you retain a positive relationship of some sort with them, but if you are ending the relationship for the right reasons, it is best for both of you.

Should you ever consider reconnecting? Does ending a relationship always mean “the end, close the book?”

That is something you have to decide. Virtually all relationships can be saved if certain conditions are met. If you have the time and are willing to make the effort, you can get through this period as an even stronger couple.

However, if you are determined to walk away, it’s best to end a relationship with a clean break and move on.